Alright gentlemen, here we go. Let’s start at the beginning. Nothing can wreck a marriage faster than finding out your wife is cheating on you.
It’s hard enough to give a girl your heart. Commitment is a slippery slope after all. With a divorce rate approaching 50% in Ghana, “til death do us part,” has kind of lost some of its teeth in recent years.
AFROSAGES does not want to feed your paranoia, and there may be plenty of good reasons why a wife sometimes acts the way she does. And those reasons don’t always mean that your wife is cheating on you. Sometimes, wives just do things for no apparent reason to you. Imagine that.
But if you suspect she’s being unfaithful, there are bound to be some telltale signs.
And you’re a fool to think that cheating is only about what may or may not go on between the sheets with somebody else.
That’s because cheating has so many levels. Sure, she can cheat on you in a physical sense. Sex is the biological imperative after all. But cheating can also take place on a psychological, social and financial level too.
And the wounds they produce can be just as painful as suspecting she’s having an extra-marital romp at your expense.
Here’s the part that really sucks. Sometimes a woman will try hard to cover her tracks. But it may be even worse when she doesn’t try hard to cover them at all. Call it disrespect. Call it indifference.
But when the signs are there in plain sight, you’re almost forced to confront them. And that can be a really crappy experience, especially if you’re still in love and still relatively happy with your wife.
They say ignorance is bliss, so if you’d rather not look for signs and want to be left blissfully unaware, stop reading now.
Otherwise, read on…
Signs Your Wife is Cheating on You
1 | She guards her phone with her life.
Depending on your level of trust and your pre-existing relationship with your wife, you may have always shared phone stuff with each other, or you may have kept a respectful distance. When those boundaries appear to change and she’s a lot less forthcoming with what’s on her phone, it could raise some questions. If she stores images on iCloud and you have access, you may be able to learn something that way, if you’re feeling threatened.
2 | Her social media habits have changed.
Some wives go through phases where everything is a post. Other times, the types of things that get posted will change. If you get a sense that the type of content or frequency of content is changing, you might want to dig a little deeper to see who’s now following her on social media or if there are some tell-tale comments from guys you don’t know, or worse yet, don’t trust.
3 | She changed her passwords.
This will feed your paranoia for sure. She’s entitled to her privacy, but if it comes at a time when you’re having marital problems, or you’re able to add this to a list of uneasy evidence that something may be going on, it could be a contributing factor to your wife wanting privacy because she is up to something.
4 | You find your wife has been lying to you about a lot of little things.
Small white lies make it easier to tell big fat black lies. If you catch your wife in the habit of being less than forthcoming with small things like where $50 was spent in your bank account, or why she was late due to traffic when the app said the roads were all clear, it’s a sign. If you can’t trust her with the small things, how can you trust her with the big things?
5 | She’s working out a lot more.
It may be a mid-life crisis or it may be Bob at the office that’s spurring her to get into shape. People go in cycles when it comes to staying in shape, so it may be nothing. Just look at it in the overall context of what else is going on in your life as well. It could also mean that her new hook-up is actually meeting her at the gym!
6 | She can be hard to get a hold of when she’s out running errands.
She may be tuning you out because she is tuning into someone else. If your wife is always hardwired into her phone and then you hit a stretch where she’s not, that’s a change worth noting. Give her the benefit of the doubt, but do make sure you ask her why, just to see what her answer is.
7 | She’s going out a lot more with friends you barely recognize.
A separate social life is cool and often times needed to maintain a healthy marriage. But if she’s running around with a different crowd, that means she may also be meeting different men as well. With long-standing friends, you always have the advantage of familiarity to quiz them and look for anything your wife might be up to, but you lose that when she starts running with the new girls on the block.
8 | There are irregularities in your bank account or credit cards.
If you can’t match up the vast majority of the things she charges up with the stories she tells you about where she’s been, then you could be looking at a red flag. Paying for things in cash when they have been paid for by a debit or credit card in the past are also ways to cover up tracks and details about messing around.
9 | She opens up separate lines of credit or gets a separate credit card.
Lots of spouses have separate accounts and it’s no big thing. But if you’ve been having trouble in your marriage, guess who might be setting the table for one in the weeks and months to come?
10 | She is always the first one to grab the mail.
If she’s in charge of domestic issues, and it’s normal, then this is no big thing. But if you normally get the mail, or if you start noticing things coming in the post that are addressed only to her, it wouldn’t be out of line to maybe quiz her a little bit and watch her reaction. If you catch her off guard in something postal she’s doing that’s a precursor or a part of cheating, her poker face may not be enough to save her from suspicion.
11 | She doesn’t take interest in your social life anymore.
Not only that, she encourages you to hang out with the guys a lot more than normal. Shuffling you off to the side gives her added free time to get into mischief. She may also dip out at the last minute due to mysterious illnesses, or not want to hear about what a great time you had at a concert or watching your favorite team play. This kind of stuff can ebb over time, especially when kids are involved, but it could also mean she’s now playing for a different team as well.
12 | She avoids your friends.
Mentally and physically dipping out on your social circle is a real clue that she’s at least not happy, and at worst, she’s found a new friend to tickle her fancy. Keep in mind that your friends can often spot when your wife is acting differently and many times, wives know this. So rather than try to bluff through a situation, they’ll avoid that possibility completely. You can’t tell a lie if you don’t put yourself in a position to be asked about it.
13 | She gets angry with you a lot more.
Hello? When she gets angry with you whether you did something wrong or not, it makes it easier for her to justify cheating on you as well. “I’m angry with him, so I’ll do this bad thing to make me feel better.” It may not be logical, but it does happen.
14 | She spends less and less time with you.
Your wife used to be your best friend. You loved doing all kinds of things together. You went to sappy chick flicks and she went to college football games, even when both of you would rather be somewhere else. Mentally divorcing you is one of the first steps to physically cheating on you. There’s a hint of selfishness mixed in here and its one thing to lose passion for being with each other over time, but quite another to actively look to avoid spending time with each other.