Compatibility makes love work… More like the saying a soul mate is a goal mate.
Don’t marry someone who disagrees with you on the fundamental issues of life because of love. Love alone is a poor basis for a happy married life. Married people have to make daily practical decisions. Agreement about fundamental principles make that process easier.
Married life is tough. Marrying for “love” despite fundamental disagreements about life, values, and goals will make it tougher.
Research shows that emotional love begins to fade after two years of marriage. Intentional love, shared goals, friendship, partnership, caring, attention, and commitment are the things that keep couples together after year two (2).
I am sure marriage without love is equally horrible. The ideal is to marry someone who shares your goals and values. If you don’t find him/her, WAIT. Life is not a sprint; it’s a marathon.
Love and compatibility are not mutually exclusive. Find someone you love, who also shares your goals and values.
Some fundamental issues of life:
Values – what is important to you.
Goals – where you are going.
Principles – how you want to live.
Family – children, discipline, vision etc
Money – how we’ll make and use it
Religion – how important is it
Philosophy – how you think about life
Love dies in the crucible of daily arguments. Compatibility makes love work. If you’re doubting, ask “Brangelina” and all the divorced couples who were hopelessly in love.